(Zhu Town, China) In summer, I hope to be back in China, contributing to its development.

In another 6 hours, I will be in New York celebrating the passing of the year with my friends. This has put me in a mood for recollection, and there is much to recollect this year. This is probably my happiest and longest year. It is vastly different from the years before, when I was still stuck in a system I could no longer believe in.

I lived and died so many times this year, as the pace of change quickens. During the military years, life was at a standstill. I did a lot in the military, but somehow, these things I did do not add up to any coherent direction. There was simply no larger goal that I could work towards as a conscript, as I had already decided that my life and future laid in the larger world out there, and not in the physical space of Singapore where I had to reside as a conscript. Even as Chief Knowledge Manager in my 25 000 strong unit, I wrote papers on Knowledge Management strategies, which would never be implemented because of a senseless bureaucracy…and this frustrated me.

Then college applications came out, and I got into all the top schools I wanted to go to. I was not ecstatic (even though I should be, since I got into the Huntsman Program), as I knew that regardless of where I went to, my life and future is divorced from the name of my school. I was simply glad to know that a future overseas awaited, a future that will help me become the global citizen I seek to be.

Life started again after conscription. There was the sense of optimism and relief at the end of conscription, as I knew that my body was free and mine to direct again as I pleased. There was also bitterness, as I knew that I had lost two years to a cause that lacked any meaning for me. My thoughts, dreams, and desires had become so distinct from my peer group, that it was hard to relate all these to them.

I was working as a research assistant at Centennial Group when I met Philip, who advised me to take the summer off. I realized it was something I had to do, as I wanted dearly to retrace my route in East Asia, and meet up with all my friends in Japan, Taiwan, China and Korea who I lost along the way as the army separated me from them. My journey retraced the future as much as it retraced the past. In Taiwan, I stayed with Hsin Yu in a small town, learning the charms of a different life. In Tokyo, I presented at the World Bank’s Annual Bank Conference on Development Economics, catching a glimpse into a future that awaited me. In Seoul, my friends taught me Korean, and I learnt about the politics, culture and economics of an amazing society. Like when I was in Europe the year before, this period was therapeutic, as it allowed me to think about the tantalizing future, and plan for it. It also helped me forget my conscripted past, and now conscription seems like a distant past, a nightmare that had finally ceased. I lived and died so many times during this period, as I entered different countries, made new friends, explored my environment, and then left not knowing when I would see this small period of stability again.

And now, in college, I am living the future I dreamt off. I made many great friends with my peers, with graduate students, and with professors. I have taken every opportunity to explore and learn, from attending speaking classes, to listening in on guest lectures on North Korea’s economy, to writing research papers on Korean markets, or even just by walking around the college halls listening to my friends’ stories. I am also working on an amazing project, conceiving a new healthcare model and implementing it in West Philadelphia. I am chasing my interests in economic and political development, and I am laying my foundations for fighting global poverty in the future.

The past, with all its accomplishments, sorrows, and baggage, has faded away. I do not drift, as I have the things I wish to accomplish to guide me. I believe I will make an impact on society, and this belief lies in the future, a future which I am always planning for (taking note that occasionally, serendipity will radically alter my course). The problem with me is that my dreams always lie in the future. But it is now a bright future, and one I have the freedom to actively work towards. 2006 was my year of tumultuous change, of freedom, of transformation. 2007 will be even better. I intend to make it so.